Oh bother

Isn't it frustrating that everybody seems so tied to their phones but when you really need to call them, right this moment for a deadline they seemed to have fallen off the face of the world.


In other news, the boy is away for the night. So I can do whatever I want. But I probably won't.

Nom Nom Nom Face cake

As an add on to the post about too much self-esteem I've found that it gets worse.

You can be up yourself with FOOD.

Why not make a wedding cake of yourself?

Or upon making flicking through a wedding magazine over breakfast they give the suggestion that 'why not make cameo style cookies of you and your husband'.

Really why not? Because everyone wants to see their face in icing.

Uh

On a better note, See this wonderful cake ------->

To do list...

Inspired by Cool People I know I thought I may write a list of things I hope to do in my life. Call it Bucket List or what you will.

The further the list goes, the less it is in order. So no order really.

1. Be more greatful (I know the theories but I never put them into practice.
2. Go to France
3. Speak fluent French in France
4. Have a 50th Wedding anniversary
5. Have well behaved children
6. Walk the Great Wall of China
7. Go to a prestigious university
8. Feel sucessful at my school reunions
9. Go to places in song lyrics - take a photo at each
10. Do something worth writing a book about
11. Stand under a waterfall
12. Dive into a pool fully clothed
13. Buy more cocktails
14. Swim with dolphins
15. Go Scuba diving on a coral reef
16. Have a great story to tell my grandkids
17. Get a mentor
18. Get asked to be somebodies mentor
19. Eat fresh fruit, not sneeky overseas, wrong season here fruit.
20. Have a midlife crisis and run a marathon
21. Do a crazy fun job

More to come....

You suck!

This post starts much the same way as many converstations which your grandma.
In my day...

[We walked 10km in the snow to school barfoot, where the teachers were able to beat us with sticks/canes/knives/rulers when they weren't making us learn the 10,000000001 times tables]
That'sbesidethepointhowever.

People used to have low self-esteem.
There used to be Project K to help youngesters with their self-confidence issues, making friends, life skills et al.

Kids used to [genuinely] feel bad about themselves. There is still, however, drama queens and they make me equally as mad.

Some young people just need to be pulled down a notch.

They are everywhere, these kids to have been told they can do anything, be anyone, that they're special, awesome, differant, unique and should accumulate as much self-confidence as possible.

Well i'm here to tell you that you're NOT special.
You're just the same as everyone.

It should be mandatory for schools to seek out these kids and focus on them putting down more often.
We had a gem of an art teacher who upon walking into out art history class, informed several young ladies that their fake tans were so putrid that they looked like pumpkins.

For example - young ladies all about the town shopping, not even shopping, browsing. Browsing is where you pick up EVERYTHING but by nothing. I just want to get past them on the street or in the shop, but no. I have clearly infringed on their 'coolness' rights. I get the glare. Because obviously I am in a subordinate to their barriage of cool.
Well guess what -

You shouldn't have gone for a large starbucks, your bum does look big in that, and did a blind hairdresser do your hair streaks.

There I said it, and a feel alot better now.

Then it's the jobs thing - Yes I may have a service job but that does not make me your inferior, it makes a contributing member of society. I have bills dammit. And one day you will too, if you ever leave home.

It's enough to make you actually say the things you think in your head.

What is up?

I must admit, that this post was inspired in part about a post I read the other about the very impressive and slightly time consuming blog stalking.

Good effort One Fine Weasel

Social networking is about keeping up with friends.


That's what social networking is about right?

Wrong, social networking is about stalking people.

In the old days people called get 'keeping abreast' or 'keeping up with the play' with the lives of their friends and neighbours.

I prefer the term stalking. However, it's generally not the 'crazy eyes' or the cases we see on the television news. (just as a side point, please please never search crazy eyes on google images)

It all starts fairly innocently, you log to facebook/myspace/bebo [insert your obscure choice here] for what you think may be a 5 minute check, turns into HOURS.

Then as you check you startup page, you start wondering what Phil/Matt/samantha is up to then what their friends are up to, then who the friends of friends are up, the who the friends friends mother's are up to which in turn creates a horrible vortex flow on effect. (What an impressive run on sentence that was)

And then there is the potential for the ever present social gaff, the dreaded ex 'situation'. The internet is like the worst thing for exs and doomed-to-be-forever crushes. It used to be the only thing you had to worry about was seeing them on the street but now there are a miriad of ways to get the wonderful 'i wish the ground would open up and swallow me up' feeling.

There's the old-hat methods of drunk texting/calling but NOW there's also drunk facebooking which has the two pronged effect of either making you leave cringeworthy messages or over-checking their page.

Now you can find out exs numbers, relationship status, what parties they've been at and read their comments. Funnily enough that doesn't make you feel any better about the breakup. (unless they've now became unemployed and simultaneously contracted strange facial warts)

I must love you and leave you now,

E.

P.s is anyone stalking my blog. Not counting George (because she has to) and prehaps Robyn (because we're in the same class) I'd love you know about it.

P.P.S Any funny stalking experinces?

Back seaters

You may be surprised to find out I do not have a proper drivers licence. I'm almost hitting the big 2 1 and I am still have a little yellow sign.

On the (rare) occasions I do drive with my family my brother always thinks he knows best. Except... he's 13 (and this was 3 years ago).

Right, so a 10 year old knows how to drive better than me? That really grinds my gears. (to steal a phrase) I hate the proverbial back seat drivers.

From comments on a news site from people that seem to know better than the government/police/ect ect to people that try and give you tips on things they know nothing about.

The backseat driver today is about (the bain of my life) teeline shorthand.
Teeline shorthand is a beast, created by the devil, I swear. Thanks backseat driver, it's nothing like guitar playing or your singing exam.

Have you had any experiences with the backseat driver. Please share.

Cellular phones

Or prehaps this post should be titled "ways to use technology to make me hate you"

I've heard it said that cell phones are the only things a man will brag that he has the smallest one.

Cell phones just get on my nerves to be honest (or tbh, if you're a Miley fan, use msn and think bebo iz *so* the Kewlest thing eva ^-^ In other words 13 years old) Using such abbrivations that's the first way to make me hate you. WTMMHU if you must shorten things.

There's always one person, who upon the purchase of a new mobile telephone will (painfully) test out all the ring and message tones. Nice. Way #2

And that's not all, there's the boasting. "Oh my cellphone has a mp3 player/camera/keyboard/Taser/hologram/pancake flipper/solarpowered cow caller/FLIPPING USELESS PIECE OF CRAP.

The gadgets aren't even that good. "ooh i've got a 2 megapixels on my phone." God, it's not 1997. Get a camera and you can have photos can be printed without people looking like they've watched the videotape off The Ring.
I've got a perfectly fine ipod I can listen to when I want music. It's 8gig, not 512mb.

I understand there is some sort of advantags to having all the things you use in one small gadget.
But I'm happy, quite happy in having my ipod as my music player and my phone to text and call.

I've always found the most flashly phones break in the shortest amount of time.

I don't want to pass on your "friendship tag/cuddle/kiss" - infact anyone who sends me such messages can expect to be removed from my friendship list. #3

Likewise, "Hi" the single word text message is not something I will reply to. What do you say back to that? "Hi" ? then the conversation will go absolutly flipping nowhere. #4

In the same vein is the message "What's up, i'm bored" - because that makes me feel REAL good knowing I am somewhat of a last resort entertainment. #5

That's probably what the person in the photo does. What a kool cat she is.