I've got the mad skills

I don’t need to impress any men. I've got one, and even then he's easily impressed.
"Your features are nicely arranged on your face"
But there's one I really want to impress.


My tutor.

Before you say eww and run off to make a sexual harassment claim on his behalf , stop! It's not in that way.

I want to impress him with my mad shorthand skills. I've been taking rather alot recently and I think he'd be really proud. I don't know about passing to the super crazy 97% but I'm better than the average bear. [It helps having opposeable thumbs] I've used so much shorthand he'll be sending a department email out about me, instead of those make-me-want-to-sick-in-my-mouth cert students.

You'll see. He wasn't half bad today when we had our weekly meeting. Usually he alternates between making me teary and getting along with me quite well. And what makes it worse, he has the elusive gift of the gab.
Futher updates to come.

She's so dumb, rip her to shreads

The first week of internship is over and I've realised I need to get meaner.

I'm not talking rough tough wild west mean.

More like a quasi mix of gossip girl mean crossed with the mean persistance of a bounty hunter.

Journos are ruthless....

Fwends

I've been socially accepted! 

Thursday night drinks journo drinks, I was there. We were sneeky! We snuck like sneeks.

I only had to leave so I could have tea before going out to have some photos. Otherwise I still would be there.

!!! 

P.s Weasel where are you going on work experiance? Other diploma guys weren't too sure. Express?

" I'm always home. I'm uncool."

I used to be scared that I would be like the nerdy guy from Almost Famous while on my internship.  If you haven't seen that movie, pause, stop reading, grab your keys and proceed to the nearest exit, then jump in your car and going to the video store and hire it.

Anyway, basically geeky young journalist boy writes obsessively and ditto listening to old rock. I am like young journalist boy, albeit nads and about 8ish years older. As a 16 year old a beautiful older lead singer and led zepp fan told me i would end up just like little journalist boy. Beautiful singer lives in wellington now, and is an actor and I am... a junior journalist. 

Cruel fate. 

One crucial detail, however, sets me aside from the young William Miller character... A blind self-belief. He introducted himself to everyone, name dropped to everyone. I however, talk to noone at the office except supervisor and George. Nice.

But there is hope; he got deflowered, got angry then finally realised he was uncool. Check, check, check - now all i  need to do is get angry.

"Sweet? Where do you get off? Where do you get sweet? I am dark and mysterious, and pissed off! And I could be very dangerous to all of you! You should know that about me... I am the enemy!"

I...love....that....movie. 

When i grow up

Sometimes I feel as if I do not know what I want to do in life. How does one decide this? Or do people go through life in jobs they hate just for the sake of partisipating in the labour force?

FML, since starting on internship I've finished one story and half done another two. Coinsidently they have all been on school related topics. Up-side is that I'm allowed actual breaks unlike everyone of my jobs bar one. And there's sometimes food.

I have come to the conclusion that I want to be a professional learner, to just study some interesting things and if I do by chance have to enter the work force, I will be so well skilled that I can be something cool, like a professer. Those who can't do teach right? Therefore, I can talk down to people in fancy words and everyone will by default think I'm cool.

Even my bloggability is slipping. FML

Self confidence and vans

When I grow up I want to be .... cool.

Trying to be cool quote of the day. Campbell live reporter: "It's floating better than i've ever seen a van float." - because you've seen a lot of vans float?!?!?!

Like I've explained before, sometimes you meet people that you just want to be friends with. In essence they are cool. One day i will be cool.

What are your tips? 

Tomorrow, tomorrow, I'm paranoid about tomorrow

Tomorrow is internship. Andrei is not scared, I however am.

I have many questions for you all:

1. Should I bake cupcakes tonight and take 3 or 4 in the hope that someone may remark that they look great. Then want to be my friend when I give them one?

2. Is it ever ok to wear a hot-pink pencil skirt to a professional job?

3. Should I take my vast post-it collection tomorrow? Or wait a few days?

4. Will I be invited to after-work drinks?

5. Will I start reading Perez Hilton and start using the words "scrummy" and "nom noms"?

6. Should I take up smoking so I have an excuse to hang out with my co-workers?

There's a reason why doctors say nervous dispositioned people shouldn't consume caffeine....

On a lighter note: you can't spell slaughter without laughter